People

change and it sucks. Period.

I could definitely use a good time right now. Hopefully I am going to the Ponkilla's later(:

Oh the ++ Side!
My mom is having a baby girl!
I am so excited.


Sorry this was so short. I am just frustrated.

Girls/Women/Ladies/Females

Female teenagers: 90% of them are all the same.
At one point it their Jr High-High School career, we all want to be a photographer or cosmetologist.
We all think we are so "original" or "different" when in fact most of us are exactly the same.
I tend to see this quote a lot on profiles

"I'm not like other girls"

When pretty much all the other girls are like you.
We act like no one knows what we are going through. And at one point we are all so dramatic no matter how much you want to deny it. We think breaking it off with your boyfriend is the end of the world.
Sometime in our life we  want to be an actress and make it big.
Oh and some girls that go to my school think they are so cool because they are from California. Trust me your not. Everyone is from California. Your not the only one.
Lots of girls when their in high school are "big partyers" your not cool, trust me.
At some time we "text chat" like lol omg rofl k. Yes everyone has done it.

I want to meet the people who have passed this stage in their life, who can accept the fact that they were once like that or like most of the things listed above. And have changed or grown from that experience in some way or another. Yes, these are the people I want for my friends.

monologue for theatre

Well this is the monologue I am doing for theatre class but hers is extended and I don't have nearly as much as she is saying. Its only like 3 minutes tops.
I am not acting it the way she is portraying it but here is what it is(:
But I think this monologue is pretty interesting.
Here is my monologue in writing.

KIM:

My name is Kim Kutledge and I am broken. I'm not really broken in the way that a tree becomes broken in a tropical storm or the way or the way an egg becomes broken when it is dropped to the kitchen floor before it can be put in the omelet. I am broken like a bone, painfully and somewhat grotesque to look at, but under the right conditions and proper care I will heal. [beat] What I mean to say is that I am a poet. Really, I am. Listen to this. It's a love poem. [clears throat]

Excuse me, but if you would
Give me the chance, I think I could
Do what I need to make you feel good

[long pause] What? No applause? Now you see what I'm talking about, broken. I wasn't even blessed with being tortured, Poe and Dante were tortured, I am simply ineffectual and unloved. I know what you're thinking, "Surely you jest, who would not love you?" The answer is the source of my pain and the reason I cannot heal. I do not love me. I'm like that one guy in that one 80's movie, I do everything that everyone tells me to do. On the plus side nothing is ever my fault, I can always point the finger at someone else. On the down side I talk to myself a lot. Like now for example. None of you are real. I bet you didn't know that, and I kinda hate to break it to you because I'm sure you think you're real, but I just made every one of you up. That's gotta be depressing, but don't worry about it, you'll cease to exist once I've finished thinking about you. But you wanna know the worst part? Would Keanu Reeves please stand up? [pause] See? He's not here! He's never here! I'm so broken that I can't even control my own hallucinations even after I've accepted that fact that they're hallucinations. I know you're wondering about the whole Keanu Reeves thing, but even if he can't act he can say "woah" with the best of them and if he wore his Matrix costume he wouldn't have to say a thing. [beat] Maybe I should go see a psychiatrist about this. I'm pretty sure it's not normal. He'd most likely tell me it was 'advanced projected schizophrenia' or something. I'm sure he'd ask me, "Do you occasionally feel like you're on stage?" and I'd say no but he'd see though it because he'd be a good psychiatrist, and I'd never go see a bad one. So I'd admit to sometimes feeling like I'm on stage and he'd ask me if I'd like to see Keanu Reeves appear and I'd deny that too, but he'd see though it again. So then I'd tell him that Keanu never showed, with or without his leather Matrix jacket. Then I'd ask him how he knew and he'd tell me that it's a pretty common thing, he used to go though something similar. It's hero worship gone horribly awry, something about not having the confidence to want to see someone actually interesting. All I'd have to do to avoid these things was to believe in myself, have some confidence. [epiphany] Yes, I think that's it! Of course that's it. I can do that. I can love myself, I can. And I will. [pause] Right?

___________________

Well what do you think of it? Any opinions. I don't I thought it was interesting, and I am too lazy to type everything I feel about it.

I'm sorry,

but I do not approve of "dating" a week or two later after a pretty hard break-up. Especially when you are selfish enough to not even think of the other person. I also don't approve of this whole "friends with benefits" thing. You are either dating or not. There shouldn't be something in between. It's absolutely disturbing to me what people do on school grounds. I don't know why everybody loves to make-out, it just bugs me so much! Yeah learn a little will power and wait a couple hours so you can make-out when not everybody is watching. Oh and I know I have already said this but it's worth pointing out, stop making out against the library windows! EVERYONE is watching you and making fun of you.

On the plus side of my day. Me and Katti had quite and adventure at lunch. We went to go get a Route 66 in the cafeteria and I saw this new watermelon drink that I had never had before, so I decided to get it. It was on the to row and when it fell down and I opened the little door thing the drink started to spray out everywhere! It got all over my hands and feet. Well Katti took it out and we thought that the bottom would be popped off or something but it was just a small little whole, spraying us everywhere. On the plus side it was very delicious and it made a good story to tell  people.
Then we went over to Allie and Carson and here is how our conversation went down
Allie: How are those Gardettos Katti
Me: (eating Cheez-its) A little too cheesy thanks for asking
(a couple minutes later)
Allie: (to Carson) You have peanut butter breath
Me: Really? No it's cheese breath.
Yeah that was exciting and one of those "you had to be there" moments.
Well then we got talking about me Katti and Carson going to UofA. And later on me and Katti came to the conclusion we are going to UofA to specialize in making theories and we would call ourselves "something theories" yeah and then later on we added to that with the "something making fun of people theories" Confusing but it would be funnier if you were there.
All in all it was a good day.

++And it was even BETTER because I FINALLY tagged jenny!(:

Night With the Ponkilla's and Jenna

What I want

so much to do right now is watch Moulin Rouge! But I only have it on VHS, and my VHS is apparently "broken" or thats just my moms excuse not to set it up! All of the songs from the movie have been stuck in my head, and I NEED to watch it (or at least I really want to). Yeah so I have made it my goal of this movie on DVD. I think if you see it anywhere you should tell me, and I would love you forever and ever. I also want to watch Anastasia.

diversity

For years and years, everybody is desperately afraid to be different, in any way. And then suddenly, almost over night everybody wants to be different, and that is where we win

- Modern Family

I was watching ABCs Modern Family when this quote was said, and it got me thinking about diversity. At some point in everyones elementary-high school career they have a longing to be in the "popular" crowd and to be exactly how everybody wanted you to be. It is when we realize that being different is better, is when we grow up a little bit.

Everybody is different, and it that statement which makes out world an amazing place to live in. If everybody was the same, there would be no excitement in life. You wouldn't have different likes or dislike, opinions, religion, cultures. Everybody would be living the same boring life that I would call a gray world.

I think the Constitution is pointless without diversity. It mainly talks about people's rights and the freedom to certain things. For example we have the freedom to choose our own religion. Imagine having no other knowledge than what is taught in your religion. And what if that religion was one of the more extreme ones. I would say having a religion is almost absolutely pointless all together without diversity. It might be just me but maybe if you think about it, you will come to the knowledge that I have come to recently.

Think of your friends and how different you are, and how much you enjoy life with them right now. Imagine your friends being complete clones of yourself, no freedom at all.

All in all, strive to be different, better to learn this lesson now rather than when your 30 and regretting it.